What if you couldn't be afraid?

What if your fairy godmother came to visit, waved her wand and removed your ability to be afraid of anything?

Now before we go too far and start messing with the rules, let’s be clear – she isn’t the genie that gives you three wishes, so this is all you get. And she didn’t even ask if that’s what you actually wanted. She didn't make you rich. She didn't make you look like Dwayne Johnson or Jennifer Lopez. She didn't give you an IQ of 160. She didn't guarantee that everything you try will always work out.

She just showed up, and Wham! You’re not afraid anymore. Of anything.

What would you do?

We all have a list of things we’d love to do, “If only I weren’t afraid of…” “If only I weren’t scared to…” That’s the worst thing about anxiety and worry – they hold us back from living the lives we dream about. They put the brakes on our potential and limit what we can and do become.

One college professor asked his students to list the things they’d do, if only they weren’t afraid. Here’s a selection from the list they compiled:

• Try out for a singing show
  
• Dye my hair purple
• Ask my girlfriend to marry me
• Stop worrying what other people think
• Drop out and work on the startup I’ve always dreamed about
• Hike the whole Appalachian trail
• Kiss all the girls I can
• Take as many AP classes as possible without thinking of failing
• Tell the boy that I like how I actually feel about him
• Tell my fake friends how I really feel about them
• Ride roller coasters and do more things that give you an adrenaline rush
• Speak about my religious beliefs to everyone
• Audition for lots of dance opportunities
• Say “no” more often
• Wear whatever I want
• Sleep with the lights off at night
• Make more conversation with people I don't know
• Become a touring musician
• Write and publish a book

Every one of these wishes is a description of someone’s dream life from which they’re being held back.

When you and I look at that list, it’s easy for us to say, “Go ahead, turn the lights out! There are no boogeymen hiding under your bed!” And yet, for that person who doesn’t have the nerve to sleep with the lights off, the fear is an insurmountable barrier.

Imagine what their lives could be like if they could make that fear go away. Imagine what your life could be like if you could make the fear go away! There are so many things that we fail to even consider, let alone try.

• You’d like to move up in the company but you don’t apply for the promotion because you’re scared you’ll get passed over and it would be embarrassing.
  
• You want your kids to grow up to be happy, healthy and independent, but you cling and over-protect because you’re afraid they’ll get hurt.
• You want to start your own business but you haven’t because you’re afraid to take the risks that it requires.
• You know the relationship has run its course, but you’re afraid of starting over again and are scared of being left alone.
• You want to get that mole on your back looked at by a doctor but you’re scared that it might be something serious.

Where’s that fairy godmother when you need her?

The bad news is, there’s no such person. The good news is, you don’t need one. Because the truth is that, when it comes to removing your fears, you are your own fairy godmother.

Let’s reference another fictional character. I’m sure you remember when Glinda, the Good Witch of the South in the Wizard of Oz, said to Dorothy, “You’ve always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself.”

Fiction always mirrors real life. And in your own real life, you have the magic wand in your hand.

You see, anxiety is a decision we make. It isn’t some external, objective reality that can’t be changed. We’ve simply made the decision to be scared, afraid, intimidated and fearful so often, that it’s become a habit. Keep a habit long enough and it becomes a belief that rules your life, dictating what you will and won’t try, what you can and can’t do.

But for every fear that holds you and I back, there are thousands, even millions of people who decided, in the face of the same fear, to do it anyway. Sometimes unpleasant things happened. Most often, they didn’t. When, in spite of circumstances, those people keep making the decision to not be afraid, they eventually find their way to the goal they’ve been seeking.

And now they’re reaping the rewards.

We started this blog by asking a “what if..” question. So finish by asking another one.

What if you made a new, and different decision? What if you decided that you simply weren’t going to be afraid anymore? What if you decided that you’re simply going to try the things you’ve been dreaming about?

Here’s what going to go down: Some bad things might happen. They probably won’t. If they do, you’ll find a way around and through them. As you find your way around and through those obstacles, you’ll learn and grow and experience the glorious adventure that life can be.

And then you’ll reap the rewards.

Yes, there is a post-anxiety life waiting for you. And it’s worth the decision.

Yes, it really is that simple. You only need to wave your wand and make the decision that you won’t be afraid anymore.

Now what are you going to do?